FlamingRose changed her email address. ;) So here's me again.
Pros and Cons of Staying Home for School
Published on June 19, 2005 By FlamingViolet In Misc
This has been a much-debated issue among many forums I visit and many people I talk to. Is it really right to keep a child or teenager at home to teach him or her, or should they go to school? Violet investigates.

Pros:

- No social damage. At my old school, I was constantly made fun of, and I know the pain. Being homeschooled can take a lot of unnecessary stress off a kid's shoulders. Of course, a little bit of this stress is normal, but too much can become permanent emotional damage.

- Personal attention. It's easy to get lost during a dull lecture, easy to be overlooked among the 19 or so other students that are just as important to your teacher as you are. If you are homeschooled, you get more personal attention, and may very well perform better.

- Freedom. Schools have dress codes, limitations, and heaps of other things that can really cut a student's creativity and abilities short. Homeschooled kids may be more free to express their talents.

Cons:

- Lack of social interaction. Friendships and social life are extremely important in this world. A homeschooled child may be very unhappy, and may lack important social skills that will help them in their future at work.

- Quality of learning. There isn't really much of a way to determine whether a homeschooled child is getting as good an education as a normal one would. Sure, the parents have to be approved, but what if they're just not doing a good job of it?

- No dealing with pressure. Sure, schools these days are filled with kids hating on each other, ridiculing each other, teachers that pile students up with homework and assign them seemingly meanless detentions. But these things are the kinds of things that teach students how to deal with real life. When these people end up having to go to an actual job, they may not be ready to deal with the pressure that is put on them.

Did I leave anything out? Leave a comment!

Comments
on Jul 28, 2005
Yay M_Roast!
on Jul 28, 2005
I hated grade school because I was so unpopular and I see so many things that I don't like about the current education system that I don't know if I really want to put my kids (if I have them) in the same situation. My mother was also unpopular in school and I worry that my kids will be also. On the other hand, though, if my mother had homeschooled me and my twin sister, I don't know that it would have been better for me. I have a lot thicker skin now then when I was younger, and I can deal with jerks.
on Jul 28, 2005
if my mother had homeschooled me and my twin sister, I don't know that it would have been better for me.


Maybe you would know the difference between "than" and "then."
on Jul 28, 2005
Yeah, because spelling and grammar matter oh so much in an online forum. You were one of those jerks that pushed kids into lockers when you were in school, weren't you Icon?
on Jul 28, 2005
Having lived in 11 states in my adult life, I've seen great things happen with homeshooling and I've also seen tragedy.

Whether or not homeschooloing is the best for the kids depends on how much time and effort the parents are willing to put into it. For too many that I've seen, homeschooling was more of an excuse to not have to deal wih outside influences than educating the kids.

On the other hand, I've seen 12 year olds who are head and shoulders above the average 12th grader.

As far as testing quality of education among homeschooled kids, I think it's pretty hypocritical of the teachers unions to be pushing for testing of home, private and charter school teachers while at the same time whining that testing of public school teachers is unfair!

Luckily, we live in an area that has great schools, but if I lived in Milwaukee I wouldn't let Milwaukee Public Schools tough my kids ever! MPS is nothing short of state sponsored child neglect!
on Jul 28, 2005
Excellent example of trolling, Icon.

I don't think homeschooling is for everyone. For people who take advantage of homeschooling organizations, and have an active life outside the home I think it can be great. Every child I have ever known that was homeschooled was more "grown up", and ahead of the kids in school both emotionally and intellectually.

Some people might not consider that a good thing. I don't know myself. I just know that I am too reclusive and backward, and if I homeschooled my little girl she wouldn't get out and interact enough.
on Jul 28, 2005
Honestly, my main problem is 99% of the people in homeschooling around here are ultra-ultra-conservative evangelical Christians. It would be impossible for my daughter to hang out with them. In 20 minutes they'd be casting demons out of her and tossing us out of their organization. She's one of the most polite and well behaved children I have ever seen, but we don't shelter her much, lol.

The ultra-Liberal folks we know despise our parenting because we don't shelter her from violence and silly cartoon stuff. The ultra-Conservative people we know are outraged that she watches 'R' rated movies, listens to music that has the 'f' word in it, and politely refuses to let people impose their religious beliefs on her.
on Jul 28, 2005
Before I start ... I just want to make it clear that my wife and I are currently homeschooling two of our four children. Of the other two ... one starts kindergarten this fall, so it'll jump to three being schooled and the fourth is going to start reading lessons shortly (she just turned 4 and has expressed an interest in reading for herself).

- Lack of social interaction. Friendships and social life are extremely important in this world. A homeschooled child may be very unhappy, and may lack important social skills that will help them in their future at work.


This is a fallacy that people who are against homeschooling use alot. There is social interaction, especially (as Bakerstreet points out in a quote a little ways below this) if the parents AND THE KIDS are active in church, local community groups, or other activities. In the area that I live in there are a lot of the businesses that offer special times for homeschoolers (and homeschool groups) to come in. The local skate rinks in Chester have several hours blocked off for homeschoolers (during PS hours, true, but they do make it available). One of the local Tae Kwon Do schools offers special classes for homeschoolers. Social interaction is available if the parents and kids are willing to put a little effort into finding it.

Whether or not homeschooloing is the best for the kids depends on how much time and effort the parents are willing to put into it.


This right here is key to the whole thing. Like other activities (even public school), the kids will only get as much out of it as they (the kids and parents) put into it.

For too many that I've seen, homeschooling was more of an excuse to not have to deal wih outside influences than educating the kids.


Unfortunately, I've seen too many instances of this. Honestly, ONEinstance is too many. I've seen parents that are guilty of neglecting their children so badly that my (then 6, now 10) oldest was reading to the older (11 and 13 at that time) girls.

I don't think homeschooling is for everyone. For people who take advantage of homeschooling organizations, and have an active life outside the home I think it can be great. Every child I have ever known that was homeschooled was more "grown up", and ahead of the kids in school both emotionally and intellectually.


I, as an active homeschooling parent, have to, nay! must agree with this. Some people are not cut out to homeschool. That's parents and children. Personally, due to the circumstances that my children are in (ADHD and hyperintelligent in one and ADHD, Asperger's Syndrome (autistic) and gifted in the other), they do not work well in a "traditional" classroom. However, they excel when working with a one-on-one teaching environment.

Most (not all, just most) of the homeschooled kids that I've met over the years have been steps and years above kids that I've known that went to the area public schools. My college roommate (16 when I met him and he was already a sophmore in an BS in Electrical Engineering program) was homeschooled and scarily intelligent. The winners of the National Spelling Bee last year (I think it was last year, may have been the year before) was homeschooled.

Honestly, my main problem is 99% of the people in homeschooling around here are ultra-ultra-conservative evangelical Christians. It would be impossible for my daughter to hang out with them. In 20 minutes they'd be casting demons out of her and tossing us out of their organization. She's one of the most polite and well behaved children I have ever seen, but we don't shelter her much, lol.
The ultra-Liberal folks we know despise our parenting because we don't shelter her from violence and silly cartoon stuff. The ultra-Conservative people we know are outraged that she watches 'R' rated movies, listens to music that has the 'f' word in it, and politely refuses to let people impose their religious beliefs on her.


Now, see, I tend to be a tad bit religious (but not of the 'shove it down your throat' type) and that behavior offends me. (that groups, not yours or your daughter's).

As for the type of music, movies, etc. Some (okay a lot of the ultra-ultra-conservative religious lawyer types) shelter their children a lot. One family went so far that their teenage daughter thought she was dying when she started her monthly cycle (she finally got that visit from Auntie! Thanks, Dharma! ) My kids are not sheltered. I will preview movies before they get to see them, but that's just being responsible nowadays. 'sides, it gives me an excuse to the see the good ones multiple times.

Okay, enough rambling. Any more, and I'll turn this into my own article. Hmmm ... FlamingViolet, I'll have to thank you for that inspiration. I'll take this and turn it into my own article....

Cheers!
on Jul 28, 2005
Honestly, my main problem is 99% of the people in homeschooling around here are ultra-ultra-conservative evangelical Christians. It would be impossible for my daughter to hang out with them. In 20 minutes they'd be casting demons out of her and tossing us out of their organization. She's one of the most polite and well behaved children I have ever seen, but we don't shelter her much, lol.


Baker,

You underscore why we tend to hang out with the "nonChristian" and more liberal Christian homeschoolers; our children don't fit the "cookie cutter" mold of most conservatives.

As for homeschooling, the question isn't "is it the right choice?", but rather, "is it the right choice for you." For every family, the answer will be different, and if you homeschool your children when it isn't the right choice for you (and them), you do them as much a disservice as when you don't homeschool them when it IS the right choice.
on Jul 28, 2005
p.s.

I meant to add that the most pressing concern I have as a parent doesn't revolve around socialization, but around structure. Too much structure can frustrate both parents and children, and too little can lead to chaos.

But the socialization question, even among homeschoolers, isn't about how to get ENOUGH, but how to avoid TOO MUCH socialization. In most areas where I have lived, there are so many opportunities to participate in events with your children that you have to learn to say no, because they can detract from needed time to stay at home and actually work with your child. I suggest, on issues like this, that you study the vast amounts of material that have been written by those who HAVE homeschooled, rather than the propagandist questions proposed by critics who want to do away with the homeschooling movement altogether.